ADHD or life? - A couples perspective!

Is it ADHD or The Grey Area?

Adam and Donna

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0:00 | 34:15

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This week on Is it ADHD or Life? – A Couple’s Perspective, we’re doing something a bit different.

Sometimes the answer isn’t ADHD or life… it’s both.
In this episode we’re not trying to “prove” whether something is ADHD or not. We’re exploring the grey area — because sometimes both partners are right, and the real problem is what happens in the middle.
We start with a listener story about planning dates and remembering date nights. Is it executive dysfunction… or have they both stopped making each other a priority?

From the ADHD perspective, we talk about how ADHD can affect:
Planning and initiation (wanting to plan something and actually starting it are two different things)
- Working memory and time blindness
- Emotional overwhelm and avoidance
- The pressure of “I’ll do it later” turning into “I forgot again”

But from the non-ADHD partner’s perspective, we also talk about the emotional reality:
- Feeling disappointed even if it wasn’t intentional
- Wanting to feel chosen
- Feeling like you’re always the one organising
- Feeling like the relationship isn’t being prioritised

So instead of asking “who is right?” we ask: what if both people are right?

We then run through a bunch of real-life scenarios and talk about what the grey area looks like in each one:
- Mess and housework
- “I’ll do it later” (and why later never comes)
- Food and mental load
- Ghosting friends and family
- Phone addiction and attention in relationships

Five minute moans this week:
Messy cars (again… because of course)
Delayed reactions

And we finish with your Good, Bad and Funny — keep them coming.

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