Is it ADHD or Life? Maddy Alexander-Grout – ADHD Visibility, Debt, Masking, Trolls & Finding Your Voice

This week on Is it ADHD or Life? – A Couple’s Perspective, we’re joined by special guest Maddy Alexander-Grout — ADHD visibility coach, best-selling author, and creator of the Maddyverse.

We get straight into Maddy’s ADHD journey, because for years she genuinely thought she was broken. We talk the stuff people don’t always say out loud: struggling through life, spending addiction, debt, and the shame spiral that can come with it. We get into ADHD and money, how quickly things can snowball, and the weird (but effective) ways you end up coping — including gamifying debt, tinned tomato on toast, and sneaking drinks into pubs.

Trigger warning: we also talk about post-partum psychosis. Maddy shares how horrendous it was, and we discuss how it can be more common for ADHDers, plus spiralling, PMDD, and the pressure-cooker of new babies and no support.

We chat impulsive business decisions and trying to save money.
Then we get into the bigger picture: ADHD being seen as a “naughty little boys” condition, and what it’s like learning about adult ADHD and suddenly having that “oh… that’s me” moment. We talk imposter syndrome, internalised ableism, Right to Choose, and realising autism might be part of the picture too.

Maddy’s book is a big part of this episode (because it’s genuinely helpful and written for real humans): 📚  
Mad About Money: Managing Finances (and Life) with ADHD  
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1394299729/ref=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apin_dp_BXVWCNXTXWDR91N88CZ4

We also talk about Maddy becoming a visibility coach and what that actually means — helping people show up, live according to their values, and stop hiding their “hidden disabilities” like they’re something to be ashamed of.

We get into the Maddyverse too — a free safe place for people to talk about hidden disabilities and feel less alone:  
https://maddyverse.co.uk/

There’s loads in this one about the ADHD stuff that gets overlooked, misconceptions, and the fight to raise awareness. Maddy’s been on the BBC arguing with doctors, and we talk about the negativity in the press and public:
- Does everyone with ADHD have blue hair? (apparently yes, according to the internet)
- Are ADHDers “benefit scroungers”?
- Can good girls at school have ADHD?
- Masking, overcompensating, and becoming a “naughty adult”

Then we meet Maddy the troll slayer 🗡️ because she’s had years of learning to deal with trolls head-on — from being branded a “sickfluencer” to handling constant nasty comments. Adam, naturally, chooses to hide behind the couch.

We also talk blue badges, relationships and ADHD (past relationships, limerence, communication, people pleasing, and finding your person), plus the serious stuff like domestic abuse and why open conversations matter.

We chat neurodivergent kids too — how smart they are, how often they’re dismissed, and different ways of learning (including audiobooks — and yes, Maddy’s book is coming to audiobook soon 🎧).

We finish with Maddy’s Good, Bad & Ugly — hyperfocus, showing up, communication, and rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD).

Watch on YouTube:  
https://youtu.be/-D4Xt5Ol_KY

Find Maddy online:
www.maddyalexandergrout.com  
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/maddytalksmoney/  
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@madaboutmoneyofficial  

Maddy’s book (again, because yes we mentioned it and yes it’s worth it): 📚  
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1394299729/ref=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apin_dp_BXVWCNXTXWDR91N88CZ4

Listen on Spotify:  
https://open.spotify.com/show/46i0iGiwmgvFrlOzoW2SnS  

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https://www.adhdorlife.com  

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